Wish I Had My Own Pictures for This Post
-- I GOT THIS IMAGE FROM THE INTERNET --
Does this even come close to what I'm trying to articulate ?
I don't know . . .
. . . cause i know what it's like to test fate
had my shoulders pressed with that weight
stood up strong in spite of that hate
oh
night gets darkest before dawn
what don't kill you makes you more strong
and i've been waiting for it so long
oh
. . . the night goes on
waiting for the light that never comes
oh
i chase the sun
waiting for a light that never comes . . .
[ random excerpts from a song by Linkin Park ]
Anger, angst, extreme emotional pain, heartache, misery, being emotionally devastated - Who wants That ? Certainly not you, certainly not me.
Being able to express extremes very "eloquently", in a manner like no other - does "fascinate", even inspires me.
I would go as far as calling it an art form - even. I'm no music
"expert" or what but - Are you familiar with Alanis Morissette's "You
Learn" from her debut album "Jagged Little Pill" ? or Evanessence' "Bring Me back To Life", and as of late, Linkin Park's " A Light That Never Comes" ?
When I feel every pulse, every beat - in a musical track - when every single f____ word makes complete sense - I could listen to that musical track repeatedly, for hours on end - wala lang.
FACT IS - recently, a very young, very close friend of mine intimated/confided in me how tragic events in her life had- has -[is still] causing her so much pain - [worst case scenario - if I may say so] - a week or so after that E-mail she sent me - I do know that she is still - in a bad, DARK place - and as to how long the this "night" will be for her, at this point - I simply cannot say . . . for her, telling "everything" all to me matters, mattered - and as much as I wish it weren't he case - for now - at least, for her, as far as our friendship is concerned - that suffices for now.
As a friend, I worry, I am very concerned - shudder to think that things might even get worse - but I have to have faith that she will survive this one - in due time. I feel very sad - that she wants some distance at this point - I cannot illicit, I know I shouldn't - as to how she is coping day-to-day. Putang Ina. Ang Hirap Talaga - Now, I can only pray - and hope. And if listening to "Waiting for the Light" for hours on end is one of the many ways I try to feel better, then so be it.
I'm extremely busy these days- my photography allows me meet, {"get around" a whole lot} and make very interesting acquintances - every quite often - I'm on my toes 24/7 ! I love that {I'm having a blast} & just Happy To Be ! - of course !!! - but in the back of my mind . . . deep inside of me - a part of me is truly so, so very sad . . .
Expressing, relating, translating - accurately and eloquently - one's sentiments - through surreal images would definitely go a long, long way - would be so theraputic for me - BUT - I'm not that kind of photographer yet - {at least, not at this point} - I would love to have that talent - but I simply don't have it (Yet) - that's why I've been scrounging the internet for such imagery . . . and hoping, that by some small measure - sharing such images, even if they're not mine, at the very least, trying to articulate how I feel - will ease my sadness somewhat.
FACT IS - recently, a very young, very close friend of mine intimated/confided in me how tragic events in her life had- has -[is still] causing her so much pain - [worst case scenario - if I may say so] - a week or so after that E-mail she sent me - I do know that she is still - in a bad, DARK place - and as to how long the this "night" will be for her, at this point - I simply cannot say . . . for her, telling "everything" all to me matters, mattered - and as much as I wish it weren't he case - for now - at least, for her, as far as our friendship is concerned - that suffices for now.
As a friend, I worry, I am very concerned - shudder to think that things might even get worse - but I have to have faith that she will survive this one - in due time. I feel very sad - that she wants some distance at this point - I cannot illicit, I know I shouldn't - as to how she is coping day-to-day. Putang Ina. Ang Hirap Talaga - Now, I can only pray - and hope. And if listening to "Waiting for the Light" for hours on end is one of the many ways I try to feel better, then so be it.
I'm extremely busy these days- my photography allows me meet, {"get around" a whole lot} and make very interesting acquintances - every quite often - I'm on my toes 24/7 ! I love that {I'm having a blast} & just Happy To Be ! - of course !!! - but in the back of my mind . . . deep inside of me - a part of me is truly so, so very sad . . .
Expressing, relating, translating - accurately and eloquently - one's sentiments - through surreal images would definitely go a long, long way - would be so theraputic for me - BUT - I'm not that kind of photographer yet - {at least, not at this point} - I would love to have that talent - but I simply don't have it (Yet) - that's why I've been scrounging the internet for such imagery . . . and hoping, that by some small measure - sharing such images, even if they're not mine, at the very least, trying to articulate how I feel - will ease my sadness somewhat.
brosi gonzales
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